Bystanders and bullying

There are many reasons why colleagues at work fail to come to the aid of a fellow worker being bullied. These include:

* the bully has gone round the department and warned everybody off, often using implied threats of reorganisation (redundancy), restructuring (redundancy) or even disciplinary action against anyone who helps the target
* the bully creates a climate of fear where everybody is afraid to speak out or take action
* fear of reprisal
* very few people, when put to the test, have the integrity and moral courage to stand up against bullying, harassment, corruption etc; the target is selected often because they do have this moral courage; most people will pass by on the other side, only targets have the integrity to be a good Samaritan
* in the presence of an aggressor, particularly a devious, manipulative, charming one, many people prefer to act more like sheep than humans
* many bystanders are only mediocre at their jobs and their sense of vulnerability through fear of being targeted is thus greater
* understanding of bullying is low and many people still hold outdated views such as "why don't you stand up for yourself?" [answer - because the moment you assert your right not to be bullied the bully moves into phase two of the bullying process which is elimination and "if you can't stand the heat get out of the kitchen"
* work colleagues often have no understanding or experience of bullying, manipulation, psychological violence, etc
* some bystanders are able to employ the "I didn't know what to do" excuse to abdicate and deny their responsibility; bystanders who use this excuse make no effort to find out
* you'll be surprised to realise how many work colleagues have brown noses which you hadn't noticed before or which you'd put down to sunburn
* some of your workmates will turn out to be turncoats
* denial is everywhere
* in environments where the bullying is entrenched, it's regarded as "normal" behaviour
* work mates think that if they keep their heads down, their mouths shut and pretend nothing is happening then it won't happen to them [wrong - their turn will come eventually]
* work colleagues have their own share of problems and they're not going to risk losing their job for someone else
* your workmates are not people you have chosen to be with and they may not be friends - they just happen to be there
* work is an institution, not a family or community; your co-workers have no legal obligation towards you
* bullying goes on over a long period of time, the target eventually becomes obsessive about the bullying, work colleagues start to experience compassion fatigue and turn off; if the bullying continues, colleagues may become aggressive and actively join in with the mobbing, victimising and scapegoating as the pack mentality takes over
* unlike assault and harassment, bullying is subtle and comprises hundreds, perhaps thousands, of incidents which out of context and in isolation are trivial - thus bystanders can't see the full picture
* bullies exert power and control by a combination of selectively withholding information and spreading disinformation, therefore everyone has a distorted picture - of only what the bully wants them to see
* bullying often goes on behind closed doors so no-one sees it or recognises it
* bullying may be carried out in front of people who are unable to recognise the tactics of bullying, especially the use of guilt and sarcasm
* the bully goes to great lengths to undermine their target and portray them as a poor performer - work colleagues are encouraged to regard the target as a threat to the organisation
* the bully is a smooth, slimy, sycophantic individual who excels at deception using a combination of compulsive lying, Jekyll and Hyde nature, manipulation, mimicry of normal behaviour, self-assuredness and charm
* bullies, especially female bullies, are masters of manipulation, and are fond of manipulating people through their emotions (eg guilt); bullies see any form of vulnerability (eg the need to pay the mortgage) as an opportunity for manipulation and exploitation
* your colleagues at work have vulnerabilities too
* bullies are adept at manipulating peoples' perceptions with intent to engender a negative view of the target in the minds of work colleagues, management and personnel - this is achieved through undermining, including the creation of doubts and suspicions and the sharing of false concerns
* bullies poison the atmosphere and actively poison people's minds against the target
* when close to being outwitted and exposed, the bully feigns victimhood and turns the focus on themselves - another example of manipulating people through their emotion of guilt, eg sympathy, feeling sorry
* most bystanders are hoodwinked by the bully's ruses for abdicating responsibility and evading accountability, eg "that's all in the past, let's focus on the future", "what's in the past is no longer relevant", "you need to make a fresh start", and "forgive and forget, you've got to move on", etc.
* the bully encourages and manipulates bystanders to lie, act dishonourably and dishonestly, withhold information and spread misinformation
* the bully manipulates bystanders to punish the target for alleged infractions, ie the bystanders become instruments of harassment
* the bully is often able to bewitch one especially emotionally needy bystander into being their easily controlled spokesperson / advocate / supporter / denier
* the bully often forms an alliance with a colleague who has the same behaviour profile, thus increasing the levels of threat, fear and dysfunction
* the bully is able to charm and manipulate a number of bystanders to act as supporters, assistants, reinforcers, appeasers, deniers, apologists and minimisers
* in an environment where aggression is dominant, good people become disempowered and disenfranchised
* many people do not have the emotional intelligence or behavioural maturity to understand bullying, let alone deal with it
* when there's conflict in the air, most people want to be on the winning side, or the side they think will survive
* some people gain gratification (a perverse feeling of satisfaction) from seeing others in distress and thus become complicit in the bullying
* a few sad people think that bullying is funny
* some observers regard behavioural responses that are reasonable and civilised as a sign of weakness rather than maturity
* many people lack critical thinking skills and analytical abilities and thus cannot see through the facade or the bully's mask of deceit
* apathy is rampant
* many employers are interested only in creating a workforce of corporate clones and drones so this is what employees are programmed to be
* the bully grooms bystanders, and the target, to believe the target deserves the treatment they are receiving
* when the target of bullying is off sick, the bully labels them as having a "mental health problem" and forbids staff to contact the person
* the bystanders see only the Dr Jekyll side of the bully, but only the target sees the Mr/Ms Hyde side; Dr Jekyll is sweet and charming, Mr/Ms Hyde is evil; Mr/Ms Hyde is the real person, Dr Jekyll is an act
* many workplaces undergo reorganisation every six months (or more) therefore there's never sufficient time for employees to gain an accurate picture of the bully

It's easy to see the parallels between the actions and inactions of workplace colleagues and how Hitler was able to co-opt so many of the German people into supporting him - those with the moral integrity to refuse were arrested, tortured and shot. Hitler was not the first dictator to eliminate anyone who objected. Rome created a great empire, not by having meetings, but by killing all those who opposed them. In the workplace, those who decline to support the bully are isolated, victimised, scapegoated, have undue constraints and excessive workloads imposed, and are then subjected to disciplinary proceedings on trumped-up charges as a prelude to losing their job (as well as their career, livelihood and health).

Bystanders can make a significant difference in the workplace (and in bullying situations in school); bullies are cowards and if they sense that someone other than their target is going to expose them, they may slink away with their tail between their legs. However, bullies are extremely vindictive and will do everything in their power to destroy anyone who can see through their mask of deceit. In very rare cases you may receive information from a bystander who wants to help but is afraid to do so publicly for fear of retribution - and fear of becoming the next target.

Fear of a bullying boss, or fear of someone in higher authority who can wreck your career, is a common reason for people refusing to speak out. Disaster and death can result. An article by Olivia Barker in USA Today on 8 December 1999 titled "4 studies aim to reduce, resolve medical mistakes" reports the USA Institute of Medicine's finding that 98,000 people die each year from medical mistakes caused by cultural and systemic problems. In many cases a junior member of staff saw the error being committed but was too afraid to speak up. Bullying by consultants is rife in health services, many of whom fit the Guru profile.

Unwillingness by co-pilots and engineers on the flight deck to speak out against the erroneous and potentially fatal actions of the pilot were a factor in several major air disasters including the BEA Trident which crashed in Staines, London on Sunday 18 June 1972 and in the world's worst airplane disaster at Los Rodeos airport in the Canary Islands on Sunday 27 March 1977. In the former, the abnormal heart condition of Captain Key and his autocratic overbearing manner (it is thought these two are connected) led to a series of errors during takeoff from London Heathrow which the flight crew were unable or unwilling to highlight or correct.

In the latter, two jumbo jets (KLM Boeing 747 PH-BUF and Pan American Boeing 747, N736PA) collided on the runway after KLM's most senior pilot Captain Jacob van Zanten commenced takeoff without proper clearance from air traffic control. Fog, confusing radio communication, Captain van Zanten's impatience to get airborne (and get home before he exceeded his duty time) plus the reluctance of the co-pilot and flight engineer to question and especially overrule the Captain, contributed to 583 deaths. Pilot training was subsequently altered with the introduction of CLR (Cockpit Leadership Resource) or Cockpit Resource Management (CRM) whereby the flight deck crew work as a team rather than an autocratic hierarchy.

Today the main issue in the airline industry (and elsewhere) is bullying from non-operational managers whose priority - and sometimes sole concern - is to achieve profits for their company. The views and needs of pilots - whose concerns are over safety or legal constraints - are ignored, downplayed or overruled. When profits and safety collide - especially in the transport industry - it's profits which may gain the upper hand, especially in times of an economic downturn. The
safety system may, in this way, become eroded. Pilots who raise legitimate issues are therefore likely to find themselves fighting the company they work for, and being threatened with dismissal for "bringing the company into disrepute".

Myths and misperceptions about workplace bullying

A myriad of myths, misperceptions, falsehoods and legends surround the subject of bullying. Studies, surveys and some academic research over the last few years have tended to perpetuate false stereotypes, however, these are often the result of notoriously unreliable self-reporting tick-sheet surveys and are rarely based on experience of case work or involvement with cases.

What some people call "bullying" is really tough dynamic management
The purpose of bullying is to hide inadequacy. Good managers manage, bad managers bully. Bullies bully to hide their weakness and inadequacy, and to divert attention away from their incompetence. Many employers don't want to calculate the cost of low morale, poor productivity, poor customer service, high sickness absence, high staff turnover and frequent grievance and legal action that are a consequence of "tough dynamic management".

Bullies don't bully, they're just being assertive
People who bully are unable to distinguish between assertiveness and aggression and when challenged will speciously claim to be "assertive". Assertiveness, which is backed by integrity, recognises and respects peoples' boundaries and values, any request is polite and unconditional and there are no negative consequences if the person being asked says no. Bullies, who have no integrity, are aggressive, demanding, and regularly violate others' boundaries; aggression does not respect peoples' rights, and requests come with a negative consequence if the course of action demanded by the bully is declined.

Victim
I prefer the word "target". The word "victim" allows disingenuous people to tap into and stimulate other people's misconceptions and prejudices of victimhood which include the inference that the person was somehow complicit in the abuse. "Target" identifies the choice of the bully to be a bully rather than the misfortune of the target to unwittingly become the latest casualty of the violence of a disordered, dysfunctional, aggressive bully. To understand how and why bullies select their targets,

Victims contribute to the bullying
When held accountable, abusers, molesters, harassers, bullies and violent people abdicate and deny responsibility for their actions by blaming their victim. The "blame-the-victim" misperception is part of the same mindset that says that women who are raped were asking for it or giving off the wrong signals, that wives who experience domestic violence are deserving of it and colluding with it, and children who are sexually abused are partly responsible for the abuse perpetrated against them. Abusers, harassers, bullies and violent people seem possessed of an army of supporters, apologists, appeasers, acolytes, protectors and deniers, and appreciate all forms of support which mitigate their crime.

But surely victims must do something to invite the bullying?
Children who are abused by pedophiles do not invite the abuse, women who are raped do not invite the rape, black people do not invite harassment and discrimination because of their skin colour, gay people do not invite harassment and discrimination because of their sexual orientation, and targets of bullying do not invite abuse at work simply because they are available. The six most common reasons bullies select their targets are because of availability (wrong place, wrong time), competence (envy), popularity (jealousy), vulnerability (income and the need to pay the mortgage), emotional maturity and values, and integrity. Targets represent everything that bullies are not, and never will be.

It takes two to tango
Abusers choose to abuse, molesters choose to molest, rapists choose to rape, harassers choose to harass, bullies choose to bully. Bullying is behaviour, and behaviour is a choice, therefore bullying is a choice - a bad choice, but a choice. Abdication of responsibility for personal choice is a hallmark of bullies. Either a person knows what they are doing and is responsible for their behaviour and its consequences for others, or the person is unaware of what they are doing and therefore have diminished responsibility and are in need of psychiatric help. Bullying is in the same league as abuse, molestation, rape, paedophilia and harassment; sadly there are still some people who think that targets of these vile activities are partly responsible for the abuse perpetrated against them.

Victims are weak and inadequate
It is always the bully who is weak and inadequate. Bullies resort to labelling others as "weak" and "unstable" in order to appear "normal" in comparison. Normal people don't need to bully; only weak people need to bully to hide their weakness and inadequacy. Therefore anyone who is exhibiting bullying behaviours is revealing and admitting to being weak and inadequate.

Victims are weak
Targets of bullying have no interest in power or exercising power. They go to work to work and they are not interested in office politics or conflict. Targets of bullying have high moral values, a well-developed integrity, a vulnerability (eg need to pay the mortgage), a strong sense of fair play and reasonableness, a low propensity to violence, a reluctance to pursue grievance, disciplinary or legal action, a strong forgiving streak and a mature understanding of the need to resolve conflict with dialogue. Weak people disingenuously confuse these hallmarks of character with weakness. Targets of bullying will withstand daily abuse for months, often years, but the first time a bully gets a taste of their own medicine they immediately run whingeing to authority demanding protection. That's weakness.

Victims are loners
Targets of bullying are independent, self-reliant, self-motivated, have no need to form gangs or join cliques, have no need to impress, and have no interest in office politics.

Victims are not team players
Targets of bullying are not corporate clones and drones. They are independent, self-reliant, self-motivated, imaginative, innovative, and full of ideas. Bullies operate a divide and rule regime and work hard to isolate, exclude and disempower their target who they then falsely accuse of "not being a team player".

Victims are isolated
This is a correct observation; bullies isolate their targets in order to disempower them. It's a tactic of control used by all abusers.

Victims are sensitive / oversensitive
Sensitivity comprises a constellation of values to be cherished and nurtured, including empathy, respect, tolerance, dignity, honour, consideration and gentility. Anyone who is not sensitive is insensitive. Targets have an instinctive ability to detect malicious intent which is often labelled by those who lack this ability as "being oversensitive". Bullies are callously insensitive and indifferent to the needs of others and when called upon to share or address the needs and concerns of others respond with impatience, irritability and aggression.

Victims are too weak to stand up for themselves
Targets of bullying are high-performing employees who go to work to work. They do not go to work with the intention of indulging in conflict. Bullies select individuals who prefer to use dialogue to resolve conflict, who have a low propensity to violence, and who will go to great lengths to avoid conflict - in other words, someone who will constantly try to use negotiation rather than resorting to grievance and legal action. When a bully is held accountable, these qualities are disingenuously described by weak people as weakness.

Why can't victims deal with bullying? They're grown-ups, aren't they?
From working on and liaising with over 10,000 cases of workplace bullying I am constantly amazed at the resourcefulness, innovativeness, flexibility, determination and stamina shown by targets of abuse. The turning point in each case comes when the target finally realises they're not dealing with a normal human being like themselves, but with a dysfunctional, disordered individual who exploits a system which favours perpetrators who excel in deceiving HR and management.

Victims are unstable and unhealthy
It is bullies who are unstable and unhealthy. People who observe targets as unstable are recognising the destabilising effect of psychiatric injury although the observers have not understood psychiatric injury or the circumstances which result in psychiatric injury. Some researchers have observed destabilisation, hypervigilance etc and made the incorrect assumption that these are personality traits which existed prior to the bullying. False assumptions like this are bad science, disrespectful, insensitive and offensive. It's like seeing someone with a broken leg and making the assumption they must have been born with weak bones.

Victims can't defend themselves
Prolonged negative stress results in trauma which inhibits articulation. People who blame targets of bullying for not being able to express themselves in an articulate manner are revealing their lack of empathy and their lack of knowledge of trauma and its effects. Many bullies are serial bullies with disordered personalities (including sub-clinical psychopaths) who excel at manipulation, deception, compulsive lying and a host of antisocial behaviours. It is almost impossible to defend yourself against a determined psychopath - who comprise at least 1% of the population.

Targets aren't really bullied / harassed - they're only in it for the money
Seeking legal recourse is very expensive both financially and emotionally. Sensational "awards" that are published in the media are rare and when personal injury is involved, are based on (less than) what the person would have earned had they stayed in their job till retirement. A bullying case which ends up in a personal injury case typically consumes ten years of a person's life. Targets have a much harder time finding employment afterward (especially if they're over 40) - and even if they do find employment they end up working at a lower position with lower salary. In rare cases where the employer sacks a serial bully, the bully feigns victimhood and sues the employer for as much as they can get.

Targets are only interested in compensation
If a person appears motivated by compensation then it's likely to be not a target of bullying but a serial bully who is feigning victimhood having been called to account. Serial bullies are notoriously vindictive and when held accountable by an employer will instinctively launch a legal action to aggressively claim their rights - whilst denying everyone else their rights.

Victims of bullying are always suing employers
The target is placed in the position by the bully of having no option but to take their employer to tribunal or court. In the majority of cases, this is the first time the target has ever been involved in legal action, and their unfamiliarity with the legal system is a vulnerability that bullies and abusive employers exploit.

You shouldn't sue for bullying because it prolongs victimhood
Bullying is in the same league as domestic violence, sexual harassment, rape and paedophilia. Bullies at work are likely to be committing at least one of these offences outside work. Prosecuting the perpetrators and holding accountable those who have failed in their duty of care is very different to "prolonging victimhood". Whilst there will always be a few people who abuse the law of tort for personal gain, it is disingenuous to confuse this small minority (who may themselves be bullies feigning victimhood) with the majority of genuine cases. "Victimhood" should not be used as a smokescreen for evasion of accountability.

Targets are just whiners who can't get along with people
Targets are targeted because they are competent and popular. Bullies are jealous of the easy and stable relationships that targets have with others. Jealousy and envy seem to be the conduits for the release of the seething inner anger, hatred and resentment that bullies harbour.

Why do targets go after their employers too?
In the workplace, the employer bears the vicarious liability caused by the bully's behaviour. Employers owe each employee a duty of care. Employment law is framed around the employee holding the employer responsible. No-one (unless they're a war correspondent or work for the MoD) signs a contract agreeing to work in a war zone. [Bullied workers suffer battle stress]

If a target is truly bullied then why don't more employers side with the target?
Employers eliminate the target because they (employers) have failed to fulfil their legal duty and provide their employees with a safe work environment. Employers will do anything to avoid accountability and having to pay damages. Many organisations, especially in the public sector, have a bottomless purse when it comes to defending legal action for negligence. The purpose of bullying is to hide incompetence and most bullying is hierarchical. The bullying that one sees or experiences is usually the tip of an iceberg of wrongdoing. Also, employers are more scared of serial bullies than they are of targets, therefore it's easier, cheaper and less risky to get rid of the target; by the time the employer gets to hear of the bullying case against them, the target is probably traumatised, suffering a severe psychiatric injury, facing loss of job and income, and may not have union or legal support; therefore the employer is much more likely to win their case against a target than against a resentful, determined and vindictive serial bully.

Trade unions exist to protect their members
Whilst trade unions have achieved much for workers over the years, the Number One complaint of people contacting the UK National Workplace Bullying Advice Line and Bully OnLine (and other support groups) is that their trade union is refusing to support them in their case of bullying. See bullying in the public sector for the reasons why.

It's a personality clash
A personality clash is where two people of equal rank or status or value or power don't see eye to eye. Bullying consists of a pattern of persistent, daily, trivial, nitpicking criticism, isolation, exclusion, undermining, discrediting, setting up to fail, etc on a target who the bully has disempowered and disenfranchised. HR departments frequently write off bullying as a "personality clash", much to the delight of the bully who is always trying to heap all the blame onto their target.

There's a fine line between bullying and tough management
I've never heard anyone say "there's a fine line between a normal relationship and sexual harassment" or "there's a fine line between marriage and domestic violence" or "there's a fine line between great sex and rape" or "there's a fine line between sex education and pedophilia". Bullying (by a serial bully) and managing have as much in common as Adolf Hitler and Mother Theresa. The objectives of the serial bully are power, control domination and subjugation, achieved largely through manipulation, deception and abuse of power; "management" is a convenient cover for the serial bully's disordered, dysfunctional and always destructive behaviour.

You'll never be able to prove bullying
The same argument was put forward before the introduction of laws on sexual harassment and race discrimination. The solution is education; you can only never prove what you don't understand.

We mustn't bully the bully
Targets of bullying withstand a verbal, emotional and psychological battering for months, often years. By contrast, the first time the bully gets a taste of their own medicine they run whingeing to authority demanding protection. When called to account for the way they choose to behave, bullies use a variety of strategies to evade accountability. Denial, counterattack and feigning victimhood are common. One tactic is to claim that "you mustn't bully the bully", a disingenuous and deceptive attempt to confuse bullying (a pattern of constant daily, trivial, nitpicking criticism, isolation, exclusion, undermining, etc over months or years) with accountability (holding the bully responsible for their behaviour and its effect on others). Those in positions of authority and with responsibility for people management are notoriously vulnerable to this deception.

You mustn't demonize the bully
Your behaviour profiles are a character assassination of the bully
The behaviour profiles are the result of long-term observation of the behaviour of serial bullies. I am only the messenger. As bullies have free choice over their behaviour (if not, they have diminished responsibility and need to be under the care of a psychiatrist) then serial bullies are choosing to demonize themselves or assassinate their own character by their choice of behaviour.

Your behaviour profiles serve only to vilify bullies
I observe bullies' behaviour and report it; I am only the messenger. Bullying is behaviour, behaviour is choice, therefore bullying is a choice. A rapist deserves to be called a rapist because of their choice to commit rape. A pedophile deserves to be called a pedophile because of their choice to commit acts of pedophilia. A bully deserves to be called a bully because of their choice to exhibit bullying behaviours. Normal people do not choose to bully. All a bully needs to do to no longer merit the label "bully" is to change their behaviour and stop bullying. It really is that simple.

Bullies have high self-esteem
Bullies exhibit arrogance, narcissism, plausibility, certitude, self-assuredness, selfishness, untouchability, a sense of invulnerability and an unerring belief in their rightness and infallibility. Bullies also excel at deception and evasion of accountability. Some people mistake these for high self-esteem, which they are not. People with high self-esteem manifest their high self-esteem in having only positive interactions with others. Bullies have only negative interactions with others; negative interactions are a hallmark of low self-esteem. Bullies are motivated by jealousy, envy and prejudice which are indicators of low self-esteem. Bullying is the antithesis of high self-esteem. People with high self-esteem have no need to bully.

The notion that the workplace is full of psychotic bullies is preposterous
Firstly, the number of bullies in any workplace is always small (sometimes only one) but their influence is disproportionately large and their negative behaviour can spread through the entire organisation like a cancer. Bullies excel at deception and manipulation and are adept at co-opting others in their defence. Secondly, bullies are not psychotic. A psychotic person is unable to differentiate between reality and delusion and is mentally ill. Bullies have a clear understanding of the difference between right and wrong but consciously choose to not conform to socially acceptable standards of behaviour. When held accountable, bullies consciously use deception to abdicate and deny personal responsibility for their actions and the consequences of their behaviour for others. Bullies are sane in every sense of the medico-legal definition of the word.

Bullies are nice people really, they're just under a lot of pressure
Abusers, violent partners, harassers, rapists, molesters and pedophiles are also nice people really, it's just that they're under a lot of pressure. Lack of knowledge of, refusal to recognise, and outright denial of the existence of the serial bully are the most common reasons for an unsatisfactory outcome for employees and employers. When a serial bully is present, many people join in with the bullying, either wittingly or unwittingly. Some of these minor bullies may be nice people under pressure, but they are not the source of the bullying. One needs to look further.

There's no such thing as a "difficult person"
Over 90% of Advice line cases involve a serial bully with a disordered personality who has a history of conflict (including manipulation, lying, deception etc) with everyone. In every case it is the lack of knowledge of, or the unwillingness to recognise, or the denial of the existence of the serial bully which is the most common reason for an unsatisfactory outcome for both the employee and employer.

Bullying is more than just a serial bully
The serial bully is present in over 90% of the 10,000+ cases reported to the UK National Workplace Bullying Advice Line and Bully OnLine. Denial of the existence of the serial bully is the most common reason for an unsatisfactory outcome for both employees and employers. Serial bullies excel at deception and a surprising number of people are easily fooled by not having the emotional maturity, the experience and depth of perception to see through the deception and see behind the mask. If a serial bully is not present, it's probably not bullying you're dealing with. As the issue of bullying becomes more prominent, some people are jumping on the bandwagon and using the label "bullying" for any type of behaviour they see; in these cases it may be more appropriate to use terms such as "change management", "time management", "performance management", "organisational development", etc. There may be some bullying behaviours present but they are not what is meant by "workplace bullying".

Female bullies bully because they're under more pressure than men to succeed
A female serial bully, like all serial bullies, bullies because she chooses to bully. Bullying is behaviour, and behaviour is choice. Whilst women may face more pressures and demands at senior levels, the most successful females are not bullies - they get there because of their integrity, ability to plan and organise, and achieve. Bullies are non-achievers. The view that women must become bullies to succeed is insulting and offensive to the majority of women who succeed on hard work, persistence and skill.

Victims have problems with people in authority
This is one of the tactics that bullies and abusive employers use. They claim that the target who is busy exposing incompetence, negligence etc has "a problem with authority". Some less-than-competent mental health professionals claim this too. The truth is that targets have an uncanny knack of spotting fakes, fraudsters and weak, inadequate and incompetent people abusing their position of power; said incompetents also have an uncanny knack of being able to spot who can see through them. Targets of bullying are accountability-focused so they must be ruthlessly controlled, and if this doesn't work, they must be eliminated by all means possible. Labelling whistleblowers and targets of bullying (who have often unwittingly blown the whistle on a number of antisocial activities) as mentally ill is a tactic often used by abusive employers to deny responsibility and evade accountability.

Victims are suffering from learned helplessness
Only about 2% of people reporting their case to the UK National Workplace Bullying Advice Line exhibit any symptoms of learned helplessness. Over 90% of cases involve a target who has exhausted all possible means of resolution but who has only just realised that they are dealing with an individual exhibiting a disordered personality with whom it is not possible to negotiate or mediate. The moral courage of targets is demonstrated by their ability to withstand abuse for months, and sometimes years, but still remain determined to resolve the conflict; by contrast, bullies run whingeing to authority demanding protection the first time they are faced with accountability. When people use the term "learned helplessness" they are often seeing the symptoms of trauma resulting from prolonged negative stress (which includes confusion, bewilderment and incoherency) but wrongly assuming that these symptoms were character traits present before the abuse, which they were not.

There's no such thing as the serial bully
Denial of the existence of the serial bully is the most common reason for an unsatisfactory outcome for employees and employers. The world is full of deniers. There are those who deny that the earth is round, those who deny the Holocaust, and those who deny the existence of the serial bully. Denial of the existence of the serial bully also serves to discredit the bully's accuser. Serial bullies always try to discredit anyone who can help others see through the bully's mask of normality. By some strange coincidence, those who most vehemently deny the existence of the serial bully are those whose own behaviour most closely matches.

Victims who are bullied at school are more likely to be bullied at work
The reason people get bullied at school and again work is because they retain the same qualities throughout life - qualities which bullies despise and respond to with aggression.

Victims were abused in childhood and have unresolved issues from this
From dealing with over 10,000 cases, the number of targets of bullying who were abused as a child is similar to what you would expect to find in any random sample of the population. People are not bullied because of unresolved issues, they are bullied because they are in the wrong place at the wrong time, they have many personal qualities that bullies like to exploit, and an aggressive, dysfunctional, disordered person chose to exhibit sustained psychological and emotional violence towards them. This myth is mutually exclusive to the belief that "bullies bully because they were abused in childhood".

Targets of bullying who experienced bullying or abuse in childhood are more likely to suffer from PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder), social anxiety disorder, clinical depression, etc.
This may be true in some cases but is not true in every case. A small percentage of cases show predisposition to retraumatisation because of unresolved trauma in childhood, but this is because there are few diagnostic facilities and even fewer treatment opportunities. PTSD is a psychiatric injury and predisposition to psychiatric injury is the same as predisposition to physical injury. If you break your leg it is because the force applied to your leg is greater than the structural integrity of the bone, not because you fell and banged your knee in the playground thirty years ago. If you suffer a psychiatric injury as an adult it is because the severity and length of abuse is greater than humans are designed to withstand, not because of bullying at school or abuse in childhood.
An interesting observation to come out of studying PTSD is that the one sector of the population that does not develop PTSD is psychopaths.
The two problems with bullying are that a) bullies are rarely held to account and are often encouraged by being protected, supported and promoted, and b) we don't teach people how to stand up to dysfunctional disordered aggressors whose sole intent is violence (physical, psychological, emotional etc). I believe lessons in physical, psychological, emotional and verbal self-defence should be on the National Curriculum.

You can't get PTSD from bullying
Those who promote this view are out of touch with both reality and research. This view is also offensive to those who suffer PTSD as a result of bullying (and harassment, stalking, domestic violence, abuse, etc). The late Professor Heinz Leymann established the link between bullying and psychiatric injury (PTSD) in the 1980s and his research and experience. European Journal of Work and Organizational Psychology (EJWOP), 1996, 5(2), devoted a whole issue to bullying and its effects, including PTSD. New research is also confirming what targets of abuse have always known: bullying causes PTSD.

Bullies bully because they were abused as children
Bullies do not bully because they were abused in childhood, although bullies are adept at claiming this as a way of mitigating their crime and diverting attention away from their failure to accept responsibility for their behaviour. Many adults and professionals are deceived by this specious excuse. A large percentage of the population are abused as children (perhaps as many as 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys), but only a small number choose to become bullies in adulthood. Most abused children do not become bullies. Therefore, whilst abuse in childhood may be a factor in bullying, it is not a cause, otherwise every child who was abused would become a bully. It is the choice of the bully to bully. A bad choice, but a choice nevertheless. This myth is mutually exclusive to the myth that "people become victims because they were abused in childhood".

Bullies are being bullied
Some minor bullies may be being bullied because of the enormous pressure they are under, however, all bullying has to start somewhere and most bullying starts with a serial bully who is the source of bullying. This individual's bullying behaviour can spread through an organisation like a cancer.

Bullies should be included in support groups because they're victims too
Serial bullies with any of the profiles are not victims as they are adults with a free choice over the way they behave. The caring and voluntary sectors are rife with serial bullies who find the endless supply of vulnerable clients and vulnerable workers irresistible. Many people in the caring professions have vulnerabilities (developed from suffering their own pain) which provide them with the high levels of empathy necessary for specialist client care; these vulnerabilities also mean that such people are ripe for control, manipulation and punishment which are favourite pursuits of the serial bully. If a serial bully infiltrates a support group, the group will divide, polarise, fracture and collapse within three acrimonious months.

Bullies need help too
The definition of an adult is a person who is capable of and willing to accept responsibility for their behaviour and the consequences of their behaviour for other people. Any adult who is unwilling or unable to accept this responsibility is exhibiting diminished responsibility and needs to be subject to the provisions of the Mental Health Act and be under the care of a psychiatrist. Bullying is behaviour, behaviour is a choice, therefore bullying is a choice. Many bullies are in positions of management or power and therefore do not require help - except in their specious attempts to deceive others and to evade accountability and sanction. Bullies rely on naivety, inexperience and people feeling sorry for them and will ruthlessly exploit decent people's urge to "help" and "forgive" them - such people unwittingly swell the bully's army of supporters, enablers, apologists, appeasers, acolytes, protectors and deniers.

Paranoid Personality Disorder

The serial bully's fear of exposure is reminiscent of Paranoid Personality Disorder, a pattern of pervasive distrust and suspiciousness of others such that their motives are interpreted as malevolent. An inability to trust, doubts about others' loyalty, distortion and fabrication, misinterpretation, and bearing grudges unnecessarily are hallmarks of the disorder. Pathological jealousy, instinctive aggressive counter-attack, the need to control others, and the gathering of trivial or circumstantial "evidence" to support their jealous beliefs also feature.

The DSM-IV Diagnostic Criteria for Paranoid Personality Disorder are:

A. A pervasive distrust and suspiciousness of others such that their motives are interpreted as malevolent as indicated by at least four of:

1. suspects, without sufficient basis, that others are exploiting, harming or deceiving him or her
2. is preoccupied with unjustified doubts about the loyalty or trustworthiness of friends or associates
3. is unwilling to confide in others because of unwarranted fear that the information will be used maliciously against him or her
4. reads hidden demeaning or threatening meanings into benign remarks or events
5. persistently bears grudges, ie is unforgiving of (perceived) insults, injuries or slights
6. perceives attacks on his or her character or reputation that are not apparent to others and is quick to react angrily or to counter-attack
7. has recurrent suspicions, without justification, regarding the fidelity of spouse or sexual partner

B. Does not occur exclusively during a course of schizophrenia, mood disorder, etc

In many cases, the serial bully appears to select targets in the order of the serial bully's perception of danger of exposure of inadequacy.

Personality disorders related to Paranoid Personality Disorder

How people are vulnerable to bullying

being female in a male environment
# being male in a female environment
# not having English as your first language, or not having the national language as your first language
# being too old, or too young
# the need to pay the mortgage
# the need to support children through school and college
# being the sole breadwinner
# being single and not having anyone to support you on a regular basis# belonging to an ethnic minority
# belonging to a minority group
# having a different sexual orientation
# having a different cultural background# being reasonable and with a strong sense of fair play
# having a well-developed sense of guilt
# having caring responsibilities at home, eg an elderly relative
# having a child with special needs or who needs special care# iving alone and having no-one to turn to at the end of each day
# because you care - about your work, about your clients, about your work colleagues, about your company or organisation, about your family, and about people
# having integrity which you are unwilling to compromise or sacrifice
# being scrupulously honest# having a different religious belief
# suffering an illness, whether related to work or not
# suffering an injury, whether it be at work, as a result of work, or outside work
# having a disability or perceived disability

Narcissistic Personality Disorder

The serial bully displays behaviour congruent with many of the diagnostic criteria for Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Characterised by a pervasive pattern of grandiosity and self-importance, need for admiration, and lack of empathy, people with narcissistic personality disorder overestimate their abilities and inflate their accomplishments, often appearing boastful and pretentious, whilst correspondingly underestimating and devaluing the achievements and accomplishments of others.

Often the narcissist will fraudulently claim to have qualifications or experience or affiliations or associations which they don't have or aren't entitled to. Belief in superiority, inflating their self-esteem to match that of senior or important people with whom they associate or identify, insisting on having the "top" professionals or being affiliated with the "best" institutions, but criticising the same people who disappoint them are also common features of narcissistic personality disorder.

Narcissists react angrily to criticism and when rejected, the narcissist will often denounce the profession which has rejected them (usually for lack of competence or misdeed) but simultaneously and paradoxically represent themselves as belonging to the profession they are vilifying.

Fragile self-esteem, a need for constant attention and admiration, fishing for compliments (often with great charm), an expectation of superior entitlement, expecting others to defer to them, and a lack of sensitivity especially when others do not react in the expected manner, are also hallmarks of the disorder. Greed, expecting to receive before and above the needs of others, overworking those around them, and forming romantic (sic) or sexual relationships for the purpose of advancing their purpose or career, abusing special privileges and squandering extra resources also feature.

People with narcissistic personality disorder also have difficulty recognizing the needs and feelings of others, and are dismissive, contemptuous and impatient when others share or discuss their concerns or problems. They are also oblivious to the hurtfulness of their behaviour or remarks, show an emotional coldness and a lack of reciprocal interest, exhibit envy (especially when others are accorded recognition), have an arrogant, disdainful and patronizing attitude, and are quick to blame and criticise others when their needs and expectations are not met.

The DSM-IV Diagnostic Criteria for Narcissistic Personality Disorder are:

A. A pervasive pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration, lack of empathy, as indicated by at least five of:

1. a grandiose sense of self-importance
2. is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love
3. believes that he or she is "special" and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions)
4. requires excessive admiration
5. has a sense of entitlement, ie unreasonable expectations of especially favourable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations
6. is interpersonally exploitative, ie takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends
7. lacks empathy and is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others
8. is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of him or her
9. shows arrogant, haughty behaviours or attitudes

Antisocial Personality Disorder

Although mental health professionals are not all in agreement, the emphasis of antisocial personality disorder is, as the name implies, on the antisocial acts committed by the individual. Psychopaths, on the other hand, are diagnosed more according to personality traits, eg lack of remorse, lack of guilt, lack of conscience, etc. Whilst many psychopaths meet the diagnostic criteria for antisocial personality disorder, not all do; similarly, not all people with antisocial personality disorder meet the criteria for a psychopath.

I use the term psychopath for an individual with many of the characteristics of Antisocial Personality Disorder who is dysfunctional and violent and who expresses their violence physically (eg assault, damage to property, etc); I use the term sociopath (socialised psychopath) for an individual with many of the characteristics of Antisocial Personality Disorder who expresses their violence psychologically (eg constant criticism, sidelining, exclusion, undermining etc). Psychopathic APD people are usually, but not exclusively, associated with low socio-economic status and urban settings and tend to be of lower intelligence. Sociopaths are usually highly intelligent, have higher socio-economic status and often come from "normal", "nice", "middle-class" families.

When diagnosing a Personality Disorder, it is usual to find that the characteristics of the disorder are not regarded as problematic by the person themselves. This fits well with the serial bully's apparent lack of insight into their behaviour and the effect of their behaviour on others. However, this apparent lack of insight is more selective than it appears.

The estimate of 3% for males and 1% for females amongst the general population comes from the Prevalence for Antisocial Personality Disorder in DSM-IV, the American Psychiatric Association Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fourth Edition. However, most of the research on Antisocial Personality Disorder has been undertaken with people who are physically violent, as these people have come to the attention of the authorities (police, welfare agencies, doctors, psychiatrists, etc) through their recognised (physically) antisocial behaviour. They have committed criminal, arrestable offences. I believe relatively little research has been undertaken with people who are psychologically violent but rarely physically violent; these people tend to commit non-criminal, non-arrestable offences.

People who are physically violent tend to have low self-esteem, low intelligence and low self-discipline; people who are psychologically violent tend to have low self-esteem, high self-discipline and high intelligence. I suspect that around 2-3% of both males and females are psychologically violent - in addition to the DSM-IV estimate of 3% (males) and 1% (females) for physically violent people.

Until recently, psychologically violent people in the workplace were regarded as tough managers or difficult characters or (by subordinates) as a pain in the butt. These attitudes are changing as the dysfunction, inefficiency, cost, and severe psychiatric injury these people's behaviour causes is revealed (click to see effects of bullying on health, the psychiatric injury PTSD, and the cost of bullying to industry and taxpayers).

Listed below are the diagnostic criteria for antisocial personality disorder which I believe to be relevant to the serial bully. Links to related personality disorders follow. The information is provided not to diagnose, but to aid the recognition and understanding of aggressive and dysfunctional behaviour. An individual may exhibit traits of more than one personality disorder. Bear in mind that psychiatrists themselves are not unanimous on the existence, content, and diagnosis of personality disorders.

The DSM-IV Diagnostic Criteria for Antisocial Personality Disorder include:

A. A pervasive pattern of disregard for and violation of the rights of others occurring since the age of 15 years as indicated by at least three of:

1. failure to conform to social norms with respect to lawful behaviours as indicated by repeatedly performing acts that are grounds for arrest;
2. deceitfulness, as indicated by repeated lying, use of aliases, or conning others for personal profit or pleasure;
3. impulsivity or failure to plan ahead;
4. irritability and aggressiveness, as indicated by repeated physical fights or assaults;
5. reckless disregard for the safety of self or others;
6. consistent irresponsibility, as indicated by repeated failure to sustain consistent work behaviour or honour financial obligations;
7. lack of remorse, as indicated by being indifferent to or rationalising having hurt, mistreated, or stolen from another.

B. The individual is at least 18 years of age.

C. There is evidence of Conduct Disorder with onset before age 15 years.

D. The occurrence of antisocial behaviour is not exclusively during the course of Schizophrenia or a Manic Episode.

Physical violence is currently a prerequisite. However...

A. There's a lot of anecdotal evidence to suggest that people who are bullies as adults were bullies at school; this is where they learnt to bully, and learnt they could get away with it.
A1. The serial bully is unable and unwilling to act within the bounds of society, whilst insisting everyone else does. In the UK, there is a legal precedent (since March 1997, the case of a school-age girl in Wakefield) that bullying - verbal intimidation with no physical contact - constitutes common assault and is therefore now a criminal offence. Most of the offences committed by the serial bully are non-criminal and therefore non-arrestable;
A2. The serial bully is a practised liar with a Jekyll and Hyde nature who gains gratification from bullying others. The serial bully will select and bully any person whom he or she believes is a threat to them (the threat is of exposure of the bully's inadequacy) and whose exposure would threaten the bully's job, promotion prospects and standing within the hierarchy.
A3. The serial bully acts randomly and impulsively, and chooses to not be able to remember what they said, did or committed to more than 24 hours ago; the serial bully cannot think or plan ahead more than 24 hours and consequently lives forever in the present.
A4. The serial bully regularly shows impatience and irritability, especially when questioned or called to account, and then becomes aggressive; a psychological assault usually follows. See denial.
A5. The serial bully has a cavalier attitude to Health and Safety; when the target's symptoms reach the stage that other people begin to ask questions, the bully plays the mental health trap to abdicate and deny responsibility for their behaviour.
A6. The serial bully rarely stays in one position long and there is no loyalty to anyone except him or herself. Misappropriation of budgets is common to most cases involving a serial bully. The serial bully often has a poor credit rating.
A7. The serial bully shows no remorse, for he or she gives the appearance of not having a conscience. In truth, the conscience is selectively switched off. The serial bully always blames others as a means of avoiding accepting responsibility for their behaviour and the effect it has on others.

B. The serial bully in the workplace is always over 18.

C. Adult serial bullies were invariably bullies at school.

D. The bully is usually in a position of responsibility and therefore not exhibiting schizophrenia or manic behaviour; if they were, they would be relieved of their responsibility, especially for managing staff.

Diagnosis of such an individual is a challenge; how do you deal with a person who is a compulsive liar with a Jekyll and Hyde nature, is charming and glib, excels at deception and evasion of accountability, especially when that person's superiors behave in a similar manner, give him or her glowing reports, and deny everything?

Personality Disorders related to Antisocial Personality Disorder

The serial bully, narcissistic personality disorder, paranoid personality disorder, borderline personality disorder.

Other web pages of interest

Robert D Hare is a world-leading authority on psychopathic behaviour and author of The Hare PCL-R Psychopathy Checklist Revised. See http://www.hare.org/ and his articles: Psychopaths: New Trends in Research and Psychopathy and Antisocial Personality Disorder: A Case of Diagnostic Confusion

Industrial Psychopaths can thrive in business: not all psychopaths end up in prison. Many are found in management positions, according to Dr Paul Babiak speaking at the annual meeting of the American Neuropsychiatric Association.

Why do people bully

The purpose of bullying is to hide inadequacy. Bullying has nothing to do with managing etc; good managers manage, bad managers bully. Management is managing; bullying is not managing. Therefore, anyone who chooses to bully is admitting their inadequacy, and the extent to which a person bullies is a measure of their inadequacy. Bullies project their inadequacy on to others:

a) to avoid facing up to their inadequacy and doing something about it;
b) to avoid accepting responsibility for their behaviour and the effect it has on others, and,
c) to reduce their fear of being seen for what they are, namely a weak, inadequate and often incompetent individuals, and,
d) to divert attention away from their inadequacy - in an insecure or badly-managed workplace, this is how inadequate, incompetent and aggressive employees keep their jobs.

Bullying is an inefficient way of working, resulting in disenchantment, demoralisation, demotivation, disaffection, and alienation. Bullies run dysfunctional and inefficient organisations; staff turnover and sickness absence are high whilst morale, productivity and profitability are low. Prosperity is illusory and such organizations are a bad long-term investment. Projection and denial are hallmarks of the serial bully.

Bullying is present behind all forms of harassment, discrimination, prejudice, abuse, persecution, conflict and violence. When the bullying has a focus (eg race or gender) it is expressed as racial prejudice or harassment, or sexual discrimination and harassment, and so on. When the bullying lacks a focus (or the bully is aware of the Sex Discrimination Act or the Race Relations Act), it comes out as pure bullying; this is an opportunity to understand the behaviours which underlie almost all reprehensible behavior. I believe bullying is the single most important social issue of today.

Bullying...
is a form of abuse, and bullies - and unenlightened employers - often go to great lengths to keep their targets quiet, using threats of disciplinary action, dismissal, and gagging clauses. What bullies fear most is exposure of their inadequacy and being called publicly to account for their behavior and its consequences. This makes sense when you remember that the purpose of bullying is to hide inadequacy, and people who bully to hide their inadequacy are often incompetent.

A bully is a person who

* has never learnt to accept responsibility for their behaviour
* wants to enjoy the benefits of living in the adult world, but who is unable and unwilling to accept the responsibilities that are a prerequisite for being part of the adult world.
* abdicates and denies responsibility for their behaviour and its consequences (abdication and denial are common features of bullying)
* is unable and unwilling to recognise the effect of their behaviour on others
* does not want to know of any other way of behaving
* is unwilling to recognise that there could be better ways of behaving.

Bullying is obsessive and compulsive; the serial bully has to have someone to bully and appears to be unable to survive without a current target.

Despite the facade that such people put up, bullies have low self-confidence and low self-esteem, and thus feel insecure. Low self-esteem is a factor highlighted by all studies of bullying. Because such people are inadequate and unable to fulfil the duties and obligations of their position (but have no hesitation in accepting salary), they fear being revealed. This fear of exposure often borders on paranoia.

Bullies are seething with resentment, bitterness, hatred and anger, and often have wide-ranging prejudices as a vehicle for dumping their anger onto others. Bullies are driven by jealousy and envy. Rejection (which cannot be assuaged) is another powerful motivator of bullying.

Bullies are people who have not learned the lesson of consequences, ie that if they behave well there are good consequences (reward), but if they behave badly there are bad consequences (restriction, sanction, punishment, etc). Since childhood, bullies have learnt that they can avoid the unpleasant consequences of bad behaviour through the instinctive response of denial, blame, and feigning victimhood.

How to spot a bully in your workplace
If you have a serial bully on the staff they will reveal themselves by their department showing excessive rates of

* staff turnover
* sickness absence
* stress breakdowns
* deaths in service
* ill-health retirements
* early retirements
* uses of disciplinary procedures
* grievances initiated
* suspensions
* dismissals
* uses of private security firms to snoop on employees
* litigation including employment tribunals or legal action against employees

Types of bullying

Pressure bullying or unwitting bullying is where the stress of the moment causes behaviour to deteriorate; the person becomes short-tempered, irritable and may shout or swear at others. Everybody does this from time to time, but when the pressure is removed, behaviour returns to normal, the person recognises the inappropriateness of their behaviour, makes amends, and may apologise, and - crucially - learns from the experience so that next time the situation arises they are better able to deal with it. This is "normal" behaviour and I do not include pressure bullying in my definition of workplace bullying.

Organisational bullying is a combination of pressure bullying and corporate bullying, and occurs when an organisation struggles to adapt to changing markets, reduced income, cuts in budgets, imposed expectations, and other external pressures.

Corporate bullying is where the employer abuses employees with impunity knowing that the law is weak and jobs are scarce, eg:

* coercing employees to work 60/70/80 weeks on a regular basis then making life hell for (or dismissing) anyone who objects
* dismissing anyone who looks like having a stress breakdown as it's cheaper (in the UK) to pay the costs of unfair dismissal at Employment Tribunal (eg £50K maximum, but awards are usually paltry) than risk facing a personal injury claim for stress breakdown (eg £175K as in the John Walker case)
* introduces "absence management" to deny employees annual or sick leave to which they are genuinely entitled
* regularly snoops and spies on employees, eg by listening in to telephone conversations, using the mystery shopper, contacting customers behind employees backs and asking leading questions, conducting covert video surveillance (perhaps by fellow employees), sending personnel officers or private investigators to an employee's home to interrogate the employees whilst on sick leave, threatening employees with interrogation the moment they return from sick leave, etc.
* deems any employee suffering from stress as weak and inadequate whilst aggressively ignoring and denying the cause of stress (bad management and bullying)
* "encourages" employees (with promises of promotion and/or threats of disciplinary action) to fabricate complaints about their colleagues
* employees are "encouraged" to give up full-time permanent positions in favour of short-term contracts; anyone who resists has their life made hell

Institutional bullying is similar to corporate bullying and arises when bullying becomes entrenched and accepted as part of the culture. People are moved, long-existing contracts are replaced with new short-term contracts on less favourable terms with the accompanying threat of "agree to this or else", workloads are increased, work schedules are changed, roles are changed, career progression paths are blocked or terminated, etc - and all of this is without consultation.

Client bullying is where employees are bullied by those they serve, eg teachers are bullied (and often assaulted) by pupils and their parents, nurses are bullied by patients and their relatives, social workers are bullied by their clients, and shop/bank/building society staff are bullied by customers. Often the client is claiming their perceived right (eg to better service) in an abusive, derogatory and often physically violent manner. Client bullying can also be employees bullying their clients.

Serial bullying is where the source of all dysfunction can be traced to one individual, who picks on one employee after another and destroys them. This is the most common type of bullying I come across; most of this web site is devoted to describing and defining the serial bully, who exhibits the behavioural characteristics of a socialised psychopath. Most people know at least one person in their life with the profile of the serial bully; most people do not recognise this person as a socialised psychopath, or sociopath. I estimate one person in thirty is either a physically-violent psychopath who commits criminal acts, or an antisocial whose behaviour is antisocial, or a sociopath who commits mostly non-arrestable offences. For an in-depth insight into serial bullying, click here.

Secondary bullying is mostly unwitting bullying which people start exhibiting when there's a serial bully in the department. The pressure of trying to deal with a dysfunctional, divisive and aggressive serial bully causes everyone's behaviour to decline.

Pair bullying is a serial bully with a colleague. Often one does the talking whilst the other watches and listens. Usually it's the quiet one you need to watch. Usually they are of opposite gender and frequently there's an affair going on.

Gang bullying is a serial bully with colleagues. Gangs can occur anywhere, but flourish in corporate bullying climates. If the bully is an extrovert, they are likely to be leading from the front; they may also be a shouter and screamer, and thus easily identifiable (and recordable on tape and video-able). If the bully is an introvert, that person will be in the background initiating the mayhem but probably not taking an active part, and may thus be harder to identify. A common tactic of this type of bully is to tell everybody a different story - usually about what others are alleged to have said about that person - and encourage each person to think they are the only one with the correct story. Introvert bullies are the most dangerous bullies.
Half the people in the gang are happy for the opportunity to behave badly, they gain gratification from the feeling of power and control, and enjoy the patronage, protection and reward from the serial bully. The other half of the gang are coerced into joining in, usually through fear of being the next target if they don't. If anything backfires, one of these coercees will be the scapegoat and sacrificial lamb on whom enraged targets will be encouraged to vent their anger. The serial bully watches from a safe distance. Serial bullies gain a great deal of gratification from encouraging and watching others engage in conflict, especially those who might otherwise pool negative information about them.
Gang bullying or group bullying is often called mobbing and usually involves scapegoating and victimisation.

Vicarious bullying is where two parties are encouraged to engage in adversarial interaction or conflict. Similar to gang bullying, although the bully may or may not be directly connected with either of the two parties. One party becomes the bully's instrument of harassment and is deceived and manipulated into bullying the other party. An example of vicarious bullying is where the serial bully creates conflict between employer and employee, participating occasionally to stoke the conflict, but rarely taking an active part in the conflict themselves.

Regulation bullying is where a serial bully forces their target to comply with rules, regulations, procedures or laws regardless of their appropriateness, applicability or necessity. Legal bullying - the bringing of a vexatious legal action to control and punish a person - is one of the nastiest forms of bullying.

Residual bullying is the bullying of all kinds that continues after the serial bully has left. Like recruits like and like promotes like, therefore the serial bully bequeaths a dysfunctional environment to those who are left. This can last for years.

Cyber bullying is the misuse of email systems or Internet forums etc for sending aggressive flame mails. Serial bullies have few communication skills (and often none), thus the impersonal nature of email makes it an ideal tool for causing conflict. Sometimes called cyberstalking.

In environments where bullying is the norm, most people will eventually either become bullies or become targets. There are few bystanders, as most people will eventually be sucked in. It's about survival: you either adopt bullying tactics yourself and thus survive by not becoming a target, or you stand up against bullying and refuse to join in, in which case you are bullied, harassed, victimized and scapegoated until your health is so severely impaired that you have a stress breakdown (this is a psychiatric injury, not a mental illness - see health page for details on stress, or the PTSD page for details on psychiatric injury), take ill-health retirement, leave, find yourself unexpectedly selected for redundancy, or are unfairly dismissed.

Hierarchical bullying, peer bullying, upward bullying

The majority of cases of workplace bullying reported to the UK National Workplace Bullying Advice Line and Bully OnLine involve an individual being bullied by their manager, and these account for around 75% of cases. Around a quarter of cases involve bullying and harassment by peers (often with the collusion of a manager either by proactive involvement or by the manager refusing to take action). A small number of cases (around 1-2%) involve the bullying of a manager by a subordinate. Serial bullies like to tap into hierarchical power, but they also generate their own power by simply choosing to bully with impunity and justifying or denying their behaviour with rationalisation, manipulation, deception or lying.

In a case of bullying of a manager by a subordinate, it's my view that as bullying is a form of violence (at the psychological and emotional lever rather than the physical) it's the responsibility of the employer, not the individual manager, to deal with violence at work.

What is bullying?

People who are bullied find that they are:

* constantly criticised and subjected to destructive criticism (often euphemistically called constructive criticism, which is an oxymoron) - explanations and proof of achievement are ridiculed, overruled, dismissed or ignored
* forever subject to nit-picking and trivial fault-finding (the triviality is the giveaway)
* undermined, especially in front of others; false concerns are raised, or doubts are expressed over a person's performance or standard of work - however, the doubts lack substantive and quantifiable evidence, for they are only the bully's unreliable opinion and are for control, not performance enhancement
* overruled, ignored, sidelined, marginalised, ostracised
* isolated and excluded from what's happening (this makes people more vulnerable and easier to control and subjugate)
* singled out and treated differently (for example everyone else can have long lunch breaks but if they are one minute late it's a disciplinary offence)
* belittled, degraded, demeaned, ridiculed, patronised, subject to disparaging remarks
* regularly the target of offensive language, personal remarks, or inappropriate bad language
* the target of unwanted sexual behaviour
* threatened, shouted at and humiliated, especially in front of others
* taunted and teased where the intention is to embarrass and humiliate
* set unrealistic goals and deadlines which are unachievable or which are changed without notice or reason or whenever they get near achieving them
* denied information or knowledge necessary for undertaking work and achieving objectives
* starved of resources, sometimes whilst others often receive more than they need
* denied support by their manager and thus find themselves working in a management vacuum
* either overloaded with work (this keeps people busy [with no time to tackle bullying] and makes it harder to achieve targets) or have all their work taken away (which is sometimes replaced with inappropriate menial jobs, eg photocopying, filing, making coffee)
* have their responsibility increased but their authority removed
* have their work plagiarised, stolen and copied - the bully then presents their target's work (eg to senior management) as their own
* are given the silent treatment: the bully refuses to communicate and avoids eye contact (always an indicator of an abusive relationship); often instructions are received only via email, memos, or a succession of yellow stickies or post-it notes
* subject to excessive monitoring, supervision, micro-management, recording, snooping etc
* the subject of written complaints by other members of staff (most of whom have been coerced into fabricating allegations - the complaints are trivial, often bizarre ["He looked at me in a funny way"] and often bear striking similarity to each other, suggesting a common origin)
* forced to work long hours, often without remuneration and under threat of dismissal
* find requests for leave have unacceptable and unnecessary conditions attached, sometimes overturning previous approval. especially if the person has taken action to address bullying in the meantime
* denied annual leave, sickness leave, or - especially - compassionate leave
* when on leave, are harassed by calls at home or on holiday, often at unsocial hours
* receive unpleasant or threatening calls or are harassed with intimidating memos, notes or emails with no verbal communication, immediately prior to weekends and holidays (eg 4pm Friday or Christmas Eve - often these are hand-delivered)
* do not have a clear job description, or have one that is exceedingly long or vague; the bully often deliberately makes the person's role unclear
* are invited to "informal" meetings which turn out to be disciplinary hearings
* are denied representation at meetings, often under threat of further disciplinary action; sometimes the bully abuses their position of power to exclude any representative who is competent to deal with bullying
* encouraged to feel guilty, and to believe they're always the one at fault
* subjected to unwarranted and unjustified verbal or written warnings
* facing unjustified disciplinary action on trivial or specious or false charges
* facing dismissal on fabricated charges or flimsy excuses, often using a trivial incident from months or years previously
* coerced into reluctant resignation, enforced redundancy, early or ill-health retirement
* denial of the right to earn your livelihood including preventing you getting another job, usually with a bad or misleading reference

A favourite tactic of bullies which helps them evade detection is to undertake a "reorganisation" at regular intervals. This has several advantages:

* anyone whose face doesn't fit can be organised out through downsizing (redundancy) or transfer
* ditto anyone who challenges the reorganisation
* ditto, their job can be "regraded" or "redefined" to the person's disadvantage
* each reorganisation is a smokescreen for the bully's dysfunctional behaviour - everyone is so busy coping with the reorganisation (chaos) that the bully's behaviour goes unnoticed
* the bully can always claim to be reorganising in the name of "efficiency" and therefore be perceived by those above as a strong manager

However, there is never any cost-benefit justification to the reorganisation - no figures before and no figures after to prove the reorganisation has brought benefits.

Why me?

There are many reasons how and why bullies target others, and the reasons are consistent between cases. There are many myths and stereotypes such as "victims are weak" which I deconstruct on my myths page. Bullying often repeats because the reasons that bullies target their victims don't change, hence this section also answers the questions "Why do I keep getting bullied" and "Why do bullies continue to bully me?".

1) How do bullies select their targets?

The bully selects their target using the following criteria:

* bullies are predatory and opportunistic - you just happen to be in the wrong place at the wrong time; this is always the main reason - investigation will reveal a string of predecessors, and you will have a string of successors
* being good at your job, often excelling
* being popular with people (colleagues, customers, clients, pupils, parents, patients, etc)
* more than anything else, the bully fears exposure of his/her inadequacy and incompetence; your presence, popularity and competence unknowingly and unwittingly fuel that fear
* being the expert and the person to whom others come for advice, either personal or professional (ie you get more attention than the bully)
* having a well-defined set of values which you are unwilling to compromise
* having a strong sense of integrity (bullies despise integrity, for they have none, and seem compelled to destroy anyone who has integrity)
* having at least one vulnerability that can be exploited
* being too old or too expensive (usually both)
* refusing to join an established clique
* showing independence of thought or deed
* refusing to become a corporate clone and drone

Jealousy (of relationships and perceived exclusion therefrom) and envy (of talents, abilities, circumstances or possessions) are strong motivators of bullying.

2) Events that trigger bullying

Bullying starts after one of these events:

* the previous target leaves
* there's a reorganisation
* a new manager is appointed
* your performance unwittingly highlights, draws attention to, exposes or invites unfavourable comparison with the bully's lack of performance (the harder you work to address the bully's claims of underperformance, the more insecure and unstable the bully becomes)
* you may have unwittingly become the focus of attention whereas before the bully was the centre of attention (this often occurs with female bullies) - most bullies are emotionally immature and thus crave attention
* obvious displays of affection, respect or trust from co-workers
* refusing to obey an order which violates rules, regulations, procedures, or is illegal
* standing up for a colleague who is being bullied - this ensures you will be next; sometimes the bully drops their current target and turns their attention to you immediately
* blowing the whistle on incompetence, malpractice, fraud, illegality, breaches of procedure, breaches of health & safety regulations etc
* undertaking trade union duties
* suffering illness or injury, whether work related or not
* challenging the status quo, especially unwittingly
* gaining recognition for your achievements, eg winning an award or being publicly recognised
* gaining promotion

3) Personal qualities that bullies find irresistible

Targets of bullying usually have these qualities:

* popularity (this stimulates jealousy in the less-than-popular bully)
* competence (this stimulates envy in the less-than-competent bully)
* intelligence and intellect
* honesty and integrity (which bullies despise)
* you're trustworthy, trusting, conscientious, loyal and dependable
* a well-developed integrity which you're unwilling to compromise
* you're always willing to go that extra mile and expect others to do the same
* successful, tenacious, determined, courageous, having fortitude
* a sense of humour, including displays of quick-wittedness
* imaginative, creative, innovative
* idealistic, optimistic, always working for improvement and betterment of self, family, the employer, and the world
* ability to master new skills
* ability to think long term and to see the bigger picture
* sensitivity (this is a constellation of values to be cherished including empathy, concern for others, respect, tolerance etc)
* slow to anger
* helpful, always willing to share knowledge and experience
* giving and selfless
* difficulty saying no
* diligent, industrious
* tolerant
* strong sense of honour
* irrepressible, wanting to tackle and correct injustice wherever you see it
* an inability to value oneself whilst attributing greater importance and validity to other people's opinions of oneself (eg through tests, exams, appraisals, manager's feedback, etc)
* low propensity to violence (ie you prefer to resolve conflict through dialogue rather than through violence or legal action)
* a strong forgiving streak (which the bully exploits and manipulates to dissuade you from taking grievance and legal action)
* a desire to always think well of others
* being incorruptible, having high moral standards which you are unwilling to compromise
* being unwilling to lower standards
* a strong well-defined set of values which you are unwilling to compromise or abandon
* high expectations of those in authority and a dislike of incompetent people in positions of power who abuse power
* a tendency to self-deprecation, indecisiveness, deference and approval seeking
* low assertiveness
* a need to feel valued
* quick to apologise when accused, even if not guilty (this is a useful technique for defusing an aggressive customer or potential road rage incident)
* perfectionism
* higher-than-average levels of dependency, naivety and guilt
* a strong sense of fair play and a desire to always be reasonable
* high coping skills under stress, especially when the injury to health becomes apparent
* a tendency to internalise anger rather than express it

The typical sequence of events is:

* the target is selected using the criteria above, then bullied for months, perhaps years
* eventually, the target asserts their right not to be bullied, perhaps by filing a complaint with personnel
* personnel interview the bully, who uses their Jekyll and Hyde nature, compulsive lying, and charm to tell the opposite story (charm has a motive - deception)
* it's one word against another with no witnesses and no evidence, so personnel take the word of the senior employee - serial bullies excel at deception and evasion of accountability
* the personnel department are hoodwinked by the bully into getting rid of the target - serial bullies are adept at encouraging conflict between people who might otherwise pool negative information about them
* once the target is gone, there's a period of between 2-14 days, then a new target is selected and the process starts again (bullying is an obsessive compulsive behaviour and serial bullies seem unable to survive without a target on to whom they can project their inadequacy and incompetence whilst blaming them for the bully's own failings)
* even if the employer realises that they might have sided with the wrong person in the past, they are unlikely to admit that because to do so may incur liability
* if legal action is taken, employers go to increasingly greater lengths to keep targets quiet, usually by offering a small out-of-court settlement with a comprehensive gagging clause
* employers are often more frightened of the bully than the target and will go to enormous lengths to avoid having to deal with bully (promotion for the bully is the most common outcome)

Contact us for strategies to counter the serial bully's tactics of deception or how to deal with a gagging clause.

There are many myths, misperceptions and stereotypes that bullies and their supporters, apologists and deniers disingenuously use to hide the facts listed above and to further victimise those targeted; click here for insight to counter these tactics.

What's the difference between bullying and harassment?

Acts of harassment usually centre around unwanted, offensive and intrusive behaviour with a sexual, racial or physical component. Measures to identify and proscribe acts of harassment derive from the Sex Discrimination Act, the Race Relations Act and the law of assault. More recently, the Disability Discrimination Act (1996), the Criminal Justice and Public Order Act (1994) and the Protection from Harassment Act (1996) have also influenced attitudes towards harassment. Significantly, the Protection from Harassment Act accords emphasis for the first time on the target's perception of the harassment rather than the perpetrator's alleged intent.

At present, if one is being bullied and is white, British, able-bodied and the same gender as the bully, one is not currently covered by discrimination law. Ironically, one is thus discriminated against by not qualifying under existing discrimination law. Whilst the DTI like to quote the Protection from Harassment Act as the way to deal with bullying at work, the Act is designed to deal with stalkers, not an incompetent manager criticising a subordinate in a work environment.

Under the previous Conservative government, the DTI similarly quoted the Criminal Justice and Public Order Act as the way to deal with bullying. To my knowledge not a single case of workplace bullying has been resolved by either act - or is ever likely to be.

Definitions of harassment and bullying vary and there is much overlap. The essential differences between harassment and workplace bullying are as follows: